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One of the best jokes I ever heard.


hellfirejet

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There was a guy walking along Argyle St with a lion on a lead & everyone was jumping out the way of them.

A polis stopped and shouted, "Haw you, take that fucken lion to the zoo"!

Guy says, "Ok".

Next day guy was walking down Argyle St again with the lion on its lead.

Same polis stopped and said, "Haw you, ah thought I told you yesterday to take that lion tae the zoo"?

Guy says, "Ah did, Im taking him tae the pictures today".

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How do you circumcise a priest? Slap an altar boy on the back of the head.

Two priest's were taking a piss in the urinals one day and the one priest looks down and see's a nicotine patch on the other guy's dick. He says "Im not really a rocket scientist or anything, but, isnt that supposed to be on your arm?" And the other priest goes "Nah, it's working fine. Im down to two butts a day"!

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Walter,Jesus and Lennon are all stuck on a boat about half a mile from shore.The boat starts to take on water. Jesus says "i'm Jesus and i can do anything so i'm out of here and he starts to walk across the water.

Walter thinks, fuck sitting with this cunt,i'm off and he also walks across the water.

Popcorn teeth thinks, if they can do it then so can i so in he jumps - splash - sink - drowned.

Jesus turns to Walter and says "do you think we should have told him about the stepping stones?"

Walter says "what fucking stepping stones?"

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A young boy caught a priest masturbating this morning, what are you doing Father he asked. It's called wanking replied the priest, but don't worry you too shall be doing this soon. Why father the boy asked. Because my arms fycking killing me said the priest.

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