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Guess the next Takeover Saga...


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neil lemmon will buy us and we will win the european cup in season 2016-17, or maybe jock stein will come oot of hiding with elvis and bruce lee, to save us ffs talk aboot laughing stock

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Ken Dodd will front a new bid with TBK3.

The TBK3 consortium will feature Jim McColl, Brian Kennedy, Paul Murray, Martin Bain, David Murray, Dave King, the old blue knights, the barren knights and Gladys knight.

Jim McColl said "Ken Dodd is an obvious choice to front our bid. With his extensive knowledge of tax cases and years of experience working with diddy men, he is clearly the man to take Rangers forward.

Learning from our past experiences, this afternoon, I intend to launch a tattifelarious £3m bid to rescue Rangers and hope Mr Green will see that it is in the best interests of the club to write off £5m and just give it to us.

If he does not want to hand over the club to us diehard Rangers men, we shall send Mark Dingwall round with Kens tickling stick with instructions to tickle Green until he signs.

In the meantime I would ask all fans not to renew season tickets as we will need that later.

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David Murray will come in with a bumper £18 million bid for The Rangers and promise to bring back the glory days to Rangers.

David who speaks outside Ibrox in a bulletproof encased booth states he is very sorry for how things have got this far but is adamant that he is blameless in this and the debt was taken care of under his tenure, he insists he was ill advised by his men and duped by his successor Craigy boy. He will declare he will bring back all the Rangers men back on board as they too were duped and none of what has happened should fall on their doors, Bain then joins David in his special Booth.

Funding is something that David insists will not be an issue as he has some great backers in his team…..none other than TBK who will invest £0.1 million IF The Rangers knock out Milan to reach the QF of the Champions League in 3 years time. He also states his prodigy mini Murray is looking behind every sofa in his many properties and if all goes well he too will be investing in The Rangers.

The Boo’s ring around outside Ibrox while objects are thrown at the special booth which now smoke is emerging from and David, Bain and Murray fade away.

Smoke, Mirrors and Bullshit – The Rangers Takeover part 4

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fernando ricksen will submit a takeover bid along with nacho novo , vladimir weiss with jim white being the man at the forefront of the bid....

. all men who hate celtic with a passion and fernando has said he's sorry for watching porn on the plane and would love to see the club back in the champions league under his guidance for some more crazy plane journeys abroad

The Constortium will be called The White Timslayers.

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Maybe someone will launch a proper takeover bid

Someone like

A lifelong fan from Singapore

Eh what about some businessmen with Rangers at heart. Like our white knight but maybe in blue

Eh what about a bid fronted by a legend

Eh what about a bid from a wealthy mhank supporter

Eh...

Got it

Robert Wiseman has sold his dairy business. He could buy us

And milk us for everything

:sherlock:

Well he is a rangers fan. Has a season ticket for the club deck.

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David Murray will come in with a bumper £18 million bid for The Rangers and promise to bring back the glory days to Rangers.

David who speaks outside Ibrox in a bulletproof encased booth states he is very sorry for how things have got this far but is adamant that he is blameless in this and the debt was taken care of under his tenure, he insists he was ill advised by his men and duped by his successor Craigy boy. He will declare he will bring back all the Rangers men back on board as they too were duped and none of what has happened should fall on their doors, Bain then joins David in his special Booth.

Funding is something that David insists will not be an issue as he has some great backers in his team…..none other than TBK who will invest £0.1 million IF The Rangers knock out Milan to reach the QF of the Champions League in 3 years time. He also states his prodigy mini Murray is looking behind every sofa in his many properties and if all goes well he too will be investing in The Rangers.

The Boo’s ring around outside Ibrox while objects are thrown at the special booth which now smoke is emerging from and David, Bain and Murray fade away.

Smoke, Mirrors and Bullshit – The Rangers Takeover part 4

but this time for every £1 Septic spend he will spend £100 that way we can compete with the likes of Barca and defo win the champs league in the next few years

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This is highly confidential so I can't say too much or they'll know where it came from, and I'll probably be killed, but a mate from Texas has told me there is a consortium planning to take over Rangers for £50m.

It is headed by a family living in America, who used to be involved with Rangers.

They are going to bid any day now, so remember where you heard this first.

I will PM admin with some names if required.

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Rumour 1 - Mark Zuckerberg is going to buy us as he wants to get out of Facebook before it goes tits up ! ............. silent partner Tina Turner whose royalty cheque buys her a place on the board .

Rumour 2 - Roman Ibramovich . Londons no cold enough , miserable enough and corrupt & bent enough for him so Scotland is the next closest place to 'home' . Salt mines for you Regan !

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Me , my dad and a couple of old school mates are puting together a 12 mil bid to buy the club and in going to ask Stefan Klos to head our group. Anyone else putting a new bid together for the mhedia scum to print!

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I've got Goram at the front of mine (take that), plus TA Flo's guaranteed 12m to go with the 16m I've raised via school bake sales. I've already tapped up Arry Redknapp to be director of football, gotta have someone on the good side of HMRC so we can get out from under that cloud. 00000042.gif

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