Nicola Sturgeon was touring rural Scotland in the First Minister's chauffeur driven car. Suddenly a cow jumped out into the road. They hit it full on and the car comes to a stop.
Nicola in her usual jaunty manner, says to the chauffeur, "You get out and check - you were driving." The chauffeur gets out, checks and reports that the animal is dead.
"You were driving, go and tell the farmer," says Nicola, "I can't afford to be blamed for anything." The chauffeur walks up the drive to the farmhouse and returns five hours later totally plastered, his hair ruffled and with a big grin on h