Indeed you couldn't!
How about the one that when supporters complain about the coverage imbalance we're 'paranoid' and 'funny' but when they club make the same claims, they are 'dignified'?
His funniest argument though has to be that anyone can write an offensive version of an existing song, put in on Youtube and then the fans of that club must stop singing the original because of the negative association... No 'sad level stooping' there then, eh?
:D
In that case im uploading offensive alternatives to all of Neil Diamonds songs.
"It's a beautiful noise, coming out of the stand...HULLO, HULLO..."