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Celtic's QC to Complain to God About the Weather


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Celtic are furious with the late postponement of their match at Inverness and have called in a top QC to fashion a complaint out of nothing.

Pink McBridled QC has been tasked with issuing a protest to God against the weather that disrupted his weekend's shopping in the Highland capital.

When asked about the chances of success, Pinky was perky, and stated that God didn't even know His own rules!

"There is no provision in the Bible for today's rain to fall consecutively with tomorrow's rain. Ipso facto, both rains should have fallen concurrently tomorrow." whined McBridled.

An anonymous Celtic spokesman called Liewell added: "We blame Campbell Ogilvie for this call-off. Make no mistake, this rain is a direct consequence of Ogilvie's directorship at Rangers a decade ago. We are inconsolable. But I'd like to pay tribute to the great work that Stewart Regan is doing."

Having taken advice, God has conceded that His rules were written some time ago, long before every rainfall was legally challenged. He stated that He could no longer afford to divert money from His beloved Rangers and so he was discontinuing rain from Celtic's scheduled match dates for the rest of the season.

The SFA's Regan added his tuppenceworth: "I love Celtic. They are great, and I'm hoping they will pay me a bonus."

However Prince William had less sympathy for the green and grey hordes and their rain problem: "I'll be reigning over them for the next 50 years so they better just get used to it!"

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Celtic are furious with the late postponement of their match at Inverness and have called in a top QC to fashion a complaint out of nothing.

Pink McBridled QC has been tasked with issuing a protest to God against the weather that disrupted his weekend's shopping in the Highland capital.

When asked about the chances of success, Pinky was perky, and stated that God didn't even know His own rules!

"There is no provision in the Bible for today's rain to fall consecutively with tomorrow's rain. Ipso facto, both rains should have fallen concurrently tomorrow." whined McBridled.

An anonymous Celtic spokesman called Liewell added: "We blame Campbell Ogilvie for this call-off. Make no mistake, this rain is a direct consequence of Ogilvie's directorship at Rangers a decade ago. We are inconsolable. But I'd like to pay tribute to the great work that Stewart Regan is doing."

Having taken advice, God has conceded that His rules were written some time ago, long before every rainfall was legally challenged. He stated that He could no longer afford to divert money from His beloved Rangers and so he was discontinuing rain from Celtic's scheduled match dates for the rest of the season.

The SFA's Regan added his tuppenceworth: "I love Celtic. They are great, and I'm hoping they will pay me a bonus."

However Prince William had less sympathy for the green and grey hordes and their rain problem: "I'll be reigning over them for the next 50 years so they better just get used to it!"

I laughed out loud reading that especially the line "Pinky was Perky"!

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