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You Are The New Owner


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I've shamelessly stolen this idea from rab, who ran with a very similar thread about a year ago.

It always drums up talk and quite a few interesting little debates and it could be good for a quiet evening.

So imagine you wake up tomorrow morning ans you instinctively roll over to hit your alarm clock. However to your suprise your alarm clock has been replaced with a Rangers ownership certificate, a squad list and a briefcase containg a cool £100 million to improve the club.

What would you do with it?

Who are you going to keep (if anyone)? Who are you going to sign?

Would you change the management staff? What about the stadium, traing facilities and scouting network?

You must retain or have a squad of 22 players and try to be a realist, as much as posible, in terms of money that players would cost and which players we could realisticallty attract (C Ronaldo and Messi wouldn't sign for us....ever)

Lets see what everyone would do!

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I've shamelessly stolen this idea from rab, who ran with a very similar thread about a year ago.

It always drums up talk and quite a few interesting little debates and it could be good for a quiet evening.

So imagine you wake up tomorrow morning ans you instinctively roll over to hit your alarm clock. However to your suprise your alarm clock has been replaced with a Rangers ownership certificate, a squad list and a briefcase containg a cool £100 million to improve the club.

What would you do with it?

Who are you going to keep (if anyone)? Who are you going to sign?

Would you change the management staff? What about the stadium, traing facilities and scouting network?

You must retain or have a squad of 22 players and try to be a realist, as much as posible, in terms of money that players would cost and which players we could realisticallty attract (C Ronaldo and Messi wouldn't sign for us....ever)

Lets see what everyone would do!

I'd disappear with the £100 million!

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I would start off by getting my self a nice Ranger Rover with the plates Gers1st.

Then a cracking new suite :) I would then pay a some big men to break mcgeadys,maloneys & who else's legs.

then I would start by selling Mchulloch,Whittaker,Mendes.

Give Weir his retierment present.

I would then instruct Walter & Ally & the rest to use Murray park properly! example practice free kicks,shooting,passing (The basics) or they will get the mighty back hand from me! gers1st!

I would then take a holiday to Magaluf :) for a week.

Come back & inform walter he has 22 million to spend on transfers & contracts!. I would also ask him what players he would like to be told to sling there hook. example--Velicka,Smith & so forth.

I would then invest in filling in the corners off Ibrox.

then I would switch from umbro to Nike or Addidas.

I would also make sure that when celtic come to Ibrox they get the boiler room for their change room & no plumming in it.

& there fans would be constantly mocked & made fun of by the stewards:)

then I would build a statue of me outside no more then 30 feet tall :)

thats what I would do.

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I would start off by getting my self a nice Ranger Rover with the plates Gers1st.

Then a cracking new suite :) I would then pay a some big men to break mcgeadys,maloneys & who else's legs.

then I would start by selling Mchulloch,Whittaker,Mendes.

Give Weir his retierment present.

I would then instruct Walter & Ally & the rest to use Murray park properly! example practice free kicks,shooting,passing (The basics) or they will get the mighty back hand from me! gers1st!

I would then take a holiday to Magaluf :) for a week.

Come back & inform walter he has 22 million to spend on transfers & contracts!. I would also ask him what players he would like to be told to sling there hook. example--Velicka,Smith & so forth.

I would then invest in filling in the corners off Ibrox.

then I would switch from umbro to Nike or Addidas.

I would also make sure that when celtic come to Ibrox they get the boiler room for their change room & no plumming in it.

& there fans would be constantly mocked & made fun of by the stewards:)

then I would build a statue of me outside no more then 30 feet tall :)

thats what I would do.

:lol::lol:

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I'd give Boydy his fucking money!

Honestly, though, £100M doesn't give me much to play with in this footballing day and age, that's pocket money to those characters down the road at the Bernabeau.

Anyway, I'd give Walter £50M to spend on players and tell him to keep, sell and release whoever he doesn't deem up to the task. If he was making an arse of my new era by bringing in shite from half-arsed SPL clubs, I'd Abramovich him the fuck out and take-over the transfer side of things.

If shit hit the fan and Smith did act the cunt, I'd sell/release a large portion of the squad whilst bringing in Rafael van der Vaart who doesn't know if he's coming or going in Madrid, PSG's 19 year-old, centre-half, machine captain Sakho to partner big Madjid and five young lads on loan from Arsenal. Plus, a few more if I could be arsed to stop shagging all my new bitches.

Murray Parks fine, but could do with a bit of colour. I'd have Frankie Boyle working in recieption there, too, just for a giggle.

I'd reduce season card costs and get rid of those tarty, under-age cheerleaders and replace them with half-time cage fighting. A ninja with blades for hands vs. Specky the Tim.

I'd also give the bloke and his Mrs who sell all the cracking t-shirts and hoodies against the fence (Just off the Paisley Road, Edmonson Drive?) their own store within the stadium.

We'd be all fucking over it.

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£100 million

i spend all that on lawyers to help defend me against the lawsuits that would come my way, with all the allegations id make in the papers

the sun "big jock did indeed know"

the daily rhebel "john reid is a sex pest and a bigot to boot"

the herald "graham spiers rapes old ladies"

the rangers news "fuck the pope and the IRA, the fucking f****n bastards are all bigoted"

and there would be more

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£100 million

i spend all that on lawyers to help defend me against the lawsuits that would come my way, with all the allegations id make in the papers

the sun "big jock did indeed know"

the daily rhebel "john reid is a sex pest and a bigot to boot"

the herald "graham spiers rapes old ladies"

the rangers news "fuck the pope and the IRA, the fucking f****n bastards are all bigoted"

and there would be more

:praise::praise::praise:

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I'd give Boydy his fucking money!

Honestly, though, £100M doesn't give me much to play with in this footballing day and age, that's pocket money to those characters down the road at the Bernabeau.

Anyway, I'd give Walter £50M to spend on players and tell him to keep, sell and release whoever he doesn't deem up to the task. If he was making an arse of my new era by bringing in shite from half-arsed SPL clubs, I'd Abramovich him the fuck out and take-over the transfer side of things.

If shit hit the fan and Smith did act the cunt, I'd sell/release a large portion of the squad whilst bringing in Rafael van der Vaart who doesn't know if he's coming or going in Madrid, PSG's 19 year-old, centre-half, machine captain Sakho to partner big Madjid and five young lads on loan from Arsenal. Plus, a few more if I could be arsed to stop shagging all my new bitches.

Murray Parks fine, but could do with a bit of colour. I'd have Frankie Boyle working in recieption there, too, just for a giggle.

I'd reduce season card costs and get rid of those tarty, under-age cheerleaders and replace them with half-time cage fighting. A ninja with blades for hands vs. Specky the Tim.

I'd also give the bloke and his Mrs who sell all the cracking t-shirts and hoodies against the fence (Just off the Paisley Road, Edmonson Drive?) their own store within the stadium.

We'd be all fucking over it.

i'll never forget him as long as i shall live :lol:

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Ok, i'm bored so.......

With £100 million to put into the club you would be hoping to invest in areas where the club could generate revenue aswell as the playing side.

On the Park

On the playing side i would trust Walter with say, £20 million over the course of three years, as i don't expect we would need any more than that to continually beat Celtic to the title. We have a good spine to the team just now so any money would be supplementing and improving that, rather than starting fresh.

Getting players who are surplus to requirements out the door isn't easy. You can't just say "sell this players, we don't need him", you need to find a club willing to buy him.

I would also seek that assurances of the manager that the talent being procuded at Murray Park isn't going to waste and that youth is a part of our future plans. Otherwise Murray Park becomes a glorified training ground, and not the youth academy it was established to be.

Off the park

Our marketting strategy has been a shambles for a long time now. My first action would most definitely be to cancel the JJB contract effective at the end of the current season and use the time to establish a more effective marketting system. Bringing back the Rangers shops to the high street would certianly be key, aswell as expanding or overseas markets.

It is a nightmare to find official Rangers merchandise in countries where there exist large Rangers supports, such as Canada, USA, Austrailia. Making deals with local sports retailers in these countries would allow the Rangers brand to be much more accessable and known on the foreign market. Having a long-term strategy to further expand into Asia would also be a priority.

Scouting would be an area i'd like to improve. For a club our size we should have a wide scouting network to cover Europe especially, and a smaller network for the other Continents. Due to work permits in this country we wouldn't be able to sign too many players from outside the EU. There is massive potential talent on the Continent which largely goes untapped and Rangers should be a club at the forefront of finding players while they are young and developing them. It could bring in large amounts of revenue should these youngsters become the real deal, and with Murray Park and the harsh lessons learned in the SPL i don't see why this couldn't be the case.

How the club interact with the support is a much talked-about issue in the current climate. The decline of the RST and the stagnation of the RSA has led to may Rangers fans feeling disenfranchised with the club. Recent attempts by the support to change this have been relatively successful but if i was owned the club i would feel it quite embarrassing that the support are having to make such effort. Firstly, i would sit down with the influential figures in the support and draw up plans which would see all fans have a say in the direction of the club and have their oppinions heard. My suggestions would be:

1) 4 Fans Forums per season where supporters can come along and put their questions to the people in charge of their club. All questions will be taken, no restrictions and the main issues raised will be carried forward into the Boardroom and discussed in depth. A summary of these discussion would then be produced and sent to all season ticket holders and RSCs.

2) I would establish a more effective PR department dedicated to spreading the good name of the Rangers support in the media, highlighting the numerous charity initiatives which the Rangers fans have made successful whilst defending the support against undue attacks from bitter f****n bastards. I wouldn't ban "journalists" such as Spiers, McNee and Keevins from Ibrox as it would just give them a level of importance.

3) Consult with the two main fans groups to help bring the Ibrox atmosphere back from the dead. A dedicated singing section would be priority, possibly situated in either the Copland or Broomloan Fronts. Also consult with stewards to relax the enforcement of this section so that singing and bouncing will be encouraged, and more ambitious displays encouraged.

I would also consult with the support and ex-players to explore the feesibility of a Rangers museum and give the promise to financially support the initiative. Recruit the help of interested fans and historians, aswell as ex players to secure as much Rangers memorabilia as possible. A historical society of sorts which would then provide the platform for a museum.

That's just my tuppence worth, i am no business guru so could be talking a load of pish. :)

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A very brief plan of action.

* £20 million invested in increasing the capacity to around 64,000 either by filling in the screen corners, putting a third tier on the govan stand or both with immediate effect.

* Invest several million if appropriate in hiring Max Clifford to dramatically and positively lift the profile of the club including tackling those who continually seek to demonize our culture and heritage .

* Restructure our marketing and commercial departments including head hunting the best personnel for the roles.

* Invest some money in creating a new matchday experience in purposely designated areas of the stadium for ' Casual Hospitality '. Basically mini exclusive fanzones within the stadium offering food, drinks, entertainment etc for around 40 - 50 quid including match ticket but without the formal suit and tie dining.

* Introduce numerous other matchday revenue initiatives like - £5 penalty kicks ? ( Fans buy tickets for £5 and take a penalty against the substitute keeper at half time in front of 50,000 people ? ) With the help of a fast and efficient system you could have up to 100 penalties taken. They can even pay extra for a photo of their kick ?

* Prior to kick off on matchdays have stalls selling merchandise, fun carnival style games, beat the keeper penalties, music playing etc etc in designated zones outside the stadium. Generating income yet increasing the matchday experience and getting the fans in the mood.

* Give the manager a £15 million pound transfer budget and the equity of any player sales.

* Restructure and restyle the whole catering operation for fans and develop a more exciting, efficient and quality alternative making it the best in football.

* Spend time and money bringing in top people to explore and implement methods encouraging football fans to come to Ibrox and sending them home with smiles on their faces. Learn from the American sports market ?

* Change the goal celebration tune, ban Graham Speirs, have our crest sprayed at the side of the goalposts ( like Barcelona ) or in the semi circle, employ better scouts.

These are a few of the things I'd address.

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