Ty 0 Posted May 9, 2008 Author Share Posted May 9, 2008 The devil sold his soul to Cuellar If Cuellar was to ever have kids they'd be accidents. Not even the pill can stop Cuellar. McGayday once stood in a lift with King Carlos at the POTY awards. 3 mins later Aiden left, crying, without a scratch on him When Carlos was a kid, he made his mother finish his vegetables. King Carlos can leave a message before the beep You'll notice on the trip down to Manchester nobody overtaking Cuellar. That's because nothing gets by Carlos. His teeth aren't fucked, your teeth are fucked for not looking like his. Cuellar only wears shin pads to protect the other players I'd never get mad at a girl for thinking about Cuellar during sex, because I'll be doing the same thing. Incidentally your attraction to Carlos in no way affects your sexual orientation When Cuellar turns on an Xbox the screen just says "You Win" and turns itself off again. If Carlos was gay his name would be McGeady... Carlos only pretended to be injured in the last game to give the tims hope. Carlos once double teamed a girl....by himself As we all know the papers have covered McGregors various exploits with women. He's got nothing on Cuellar though, and the only reason the papers haven't listed his conquests is because it'd read like the casualty list of WW2. If you came home to find Cuellar shaggin your wife, it'd be the greatest day of your life. Carlos tells the ref when the match ends. When Carlos wants a laugh he watches McGayday run down the wing. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tumshie 205 Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 Once a cobra bit Carlos Cuellar's leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died. Carlos Cuellar uses his abs to smooth diamonds Carlos cuellar does not dodge bullets. Bullets dodge Carlos Cuellar Everynight before the bogeyman goes to bed, he checks his closet for Carlos Cuellar Carlos Cuellar doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants Carlos Cuellar isn’t afraid of the dark…the dark is afraid of Carlos Cuellar. Carlos Cuellar once killed a lion with his bare hands. Carlos Cuellar can make a woman climax just by looking at her and shouting ALLAH! Carlos Cuellar once challenged Chuck Norris to a square go. Mr Norris kindly refused the advance. Carlos Cuellar can strangle you with a cordless phone. Carlos Cuellar won a game of connect 4 in 2 moves. Carlos Cuellar can delete the recycle bin If you wake up tomorrow, it’ll be because Carlos Cuellar allowed you to Carlos Cuellar once held down eight Tigers and gang raped them. Carlos Cuellar doesn't sleep, he waits. When Carlos Cuellar does push ups, he’s actually pushing the ground down. Carlos Cuellar drowned a fish. Death once had a near-Carlos Cuellar experience. Carlos Cuellar died 5 years ago, Death never had the balls to tell him Carlos Cuellar once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands. Carlos Cuellar plays Russian roulette with a fully loaded revolver… and wins When God said, “Let there be lightâ€, Carlos Cuellar said, “say please.†Carlos Cuellar doesn’t need a miracle in order to split the ocean. He just walks in and the water gets the fuck out of the way. Carlos Cuellar put ‘laughter’ into Manslaughter!!! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
papaguy51 912 Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 Cuellar can delete the recycle bin :lol: Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
McBoyd 355 Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 Cuellar can delete the recycle bin :lol: Everyone can Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Polo 1,435 Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 Carlos Cuellar is like a dog, not only because he can smell fear, but because he can p!ss on whatever he wants. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigAmo 13 Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 . If Carlos Cuellar was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Neil Lennon, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Lennon twice. This And the small child asked King Carlos why there were only 10 Commandments. King Carlos replied, "because I didn't want 11" Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
trueblue86 0 Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 Cuellar can delete the recycle bin :lol: Everyone can God almight McBoyd you even have PS3 as your desktop, you are truly obsessed !! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wullie! 8 Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 Started sneaky reading this in work earlier (quiet office) wasn't quiet for long Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
trueblue86 0 Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 Cuellar can delete the recycle bin :lol: Everyone can God almight McBoyd you even have PS3 as your desktop, you are truly obsessed !! Oh and by the way you can't delete your recycle bin in windows XP! the options when right clicking on it are "open, explore, empty recycle bin, create shortcut and properties". So not everyone (just those with Vista by the looks of it!) :harhar: Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
evilcockney 4 Posted May 9, 2008 Share Posted May 9, 2008 McShagger is doing Cuellars cast offs. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
FlippinEck 3,715 Posted May 10, 2008 Share Posted May 10, 2008 Carlos Cuellar once got an erection during a football match, there were no survivors. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
demise 3,563 Posted May 10, 2008 Share Posted May 10, 2008 Carlos Cuellar is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you There is no 'ctrl' button on Carlos Cuellar's computer. Carlos Cuellar is always in control Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
BCLoyal9 53 Posted May 10, 2008 Share Posted May 10, 2008 But what school did he go to Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coopermania 1 Posted May 10, 2008 Share Posted May 10, 2008 Carlos can speak Scot-Spanish, si Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueSuedeSambas 54,202 Posted May 10, 2008 Share Posted May 10, 2008 I love this thread. If you spell Carlos Cuellar in Scrabble, you win. Forever. Faster than a speeding bullet ... more powerful than a locomotive ... able to leap tall buildings in a single bound... yes, these are some of Carlos Cuellar's warm-up exercises. Carlos Cuellar can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell "What The Hell was That?" "Brokeback Mountain" is not just a movie. It's also what Carlso Cuellar calls the pile of dead strikers in his front yard. Carlos Cuellar's sweat has burned holes in concrete. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danny 9 Posted May 10, 2008 Share Posted May 10, 2008 Carlos Cuellar survived Night of the Living Dead by eating all the Zombies. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueSuedeSambas 54,202 Posted May 10, 2008 Share Posted May 10, 2008 Godzilla is a Japanese rendition of Carlos Cuellar's first visit to Parkhead. They once made a Carlos Cuellar toilet paper, but there was a problem-- It wouldn't take shit from anybody. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueSuedeSambas 54,202 Posted May 10, 2008 Share Posted May 10, 2008 After taking a steroids test doctors informed Carlos Cuellar that he had tested positive. He laughed upon receiving this information, and said "of course my urine tested positive, what do you think they make steroids from?" Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest johngers Posted May 10, 2008 Share Posted May 10, 2008 They once made a Carlos Cuellar toilet paper, but there was a problem-- It wouldn't take shit from anybody. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dado'sMulls 2,634 Posted May 12, 2008 Share Posted May 12, 2008 God is merely warming the bench for Carlos Cuellar. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hoff 7 Posted May 12, 2008 Share Posted May 12, 2008 Carlos Cuellar doesn't believe in Germany. If you look up and you can see Carlos Cuellar, he can see you! If you look up and you can't see Carlos Cuellar.................. you may only be seconds away from death!!! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gartcosh Bear 124 Posted May 12, 2008 Share Posted May 12, 2008 Carlos Cuellar has invented the cure for a disease that doesn't even know it existed. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dado'sMulls 2,634 Posted May 12, 2008 Share Posted May 12, 2008 Carlos Cuellar CAN have his cake and eat it. He just prefers eating lions and wild boar instead. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
papaguy51 912 Posted May 12, 2008 Share Posted May 12, 2008 Carlos Cuellar will this time on Wednesday have a UEFA Cup winners medal Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dado'sMulls 2,634 Posted May 12, 2008 Share Posted May 12, 2008 Carlos Cuellar will this time on Wednesday have a UEFA Cup winners medal Winner! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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